The Legend

Happy Birthday Bri. At the rate you read my blog you should read this in time for Christmas at least.

Eye Am Cute

Coco Chanel #2

Happy 2nd birthday, you rascal Coco!

Going Live

My donated print sold at a live auction! This is exciting for me, first time one of my pictures has been sold at a live auction. My previous donated print sold at silent auction. The thought of people bidding on my picture is very exciting! Next stop: Christie's :)

Weekend Warriors

We kicked ass this weekend, sorry, but no other way to put it. In addition to a wedding shower and a birthday dinner, and several trips to Lowe's, we were able to accomplish the following jobs:

Tuck-pointed bricks on porch, including brick repairs
Rebuilt front porch steps
Removed ugly green awnings
Painted shutters & remaining awning over side door
Installed composite garden border in back yard
Modified backyard fences so Coco cannot escape at will anymore
Cut and edged lawn
Removed old cable TV and internet cables from side of house (it was a jungle)

That's a pretty good list of chores for a month, and we did it in a weekend! Yay for us!

:)

Shopping Kart

While I was in Best Buy getting a gift card for Heather's Dad's birthday, I noticed that Mario Kart Wii had just come out. So, being the impulse buyer that I am...

I put the box inside the basket we keep the Wii controllers in, I can't wait to see the look on Zach's face when he sees it tomorrow. I'll let you know...

Toddlers Helping Babies

Changing the baby doll's diaper.

Dogs & Legs

Some days you're the dog, some days you're the leg. It all evens out in the end.

Some Work, Some Play

"Bring Your Child To Work Day" was fun. For me, that is. With all the long meetings, I think Zach would have rather been at the dentist. That is, until he found some new friends to play his DS with. Here is a particular highlight, as he destroys the competition in a rousing wireless game of Mario Kart. Yes, the young kid in the center with the Game Boy is not really in the game, but "shh", he doesn't know that.

Monkey

My little girl can climb. I was working on the house this weekend with the ladder up and every time I turned my head, the little monkey was half way up the ladder. She has also taken to using my tools. I found a "bonus" acorn in my toolbox yesterday.

Sicky

Poor Poo. She was sick last week, had a very high temp and I stayed home with her one day. She always likes to snuggle when she is sick, and she loses her usually tremendous energy. After quite a few days of being down and not sleeping well, I am happy to report that she is feeling herself again.

Of course, a tooth has chosen this break in the action to erupt...

The Frog

We had a frog (toad, maybe?) in our lives this past week, but alas, only for a brief time. He (she?) was at our house for a few hours before being given away as a wedding shower gift. But in those few hours we fell in love with our new friend. We were very sad to see him go. Now we just sit on the couch and stare through tear-clouded eyes at the place he sat, missing his big shiny peepers and bumpy skin and smiley personality.

Not sure what we'll do without him, but Heather has hinted at going out and catching us one, for keeps.

Nothing Rockos Like Tacos

The Long And Winding Road

Heather's dad is 77 years young today! Here's to the next 77!! Keep on rollin', Don!

Steampunked

The design trend of Steampunk, where people modify current technology to make it look as if it was implemented in the victorian era, is really catching on. I have seen steampunked computers, action figures, electric guitars, even Nerf rifles. Pictured above is a personal computer in all its steampunk glory. The first time I saw steampunk was in the movie Dune, directed by David Lynch. The worlds of Arrakis, Caladan, Geidi Prime, and Kaitain were literally brimming with steampunk devices.

It's a weird concept, but I kinda like it. The people who engage in it are very serious about it and often very talented. Google it and check out some of the insanity...

"Seeping With Mommy"

Pianos and Potato Chips

Zach loves the show "How It's Made" on the Science Channel. I have been "DVRing it" for about a month and he watches one while he eats breakfast. This show goes through the processes for making a whole array of diverse products, from bubble bath to British police helmets. It's really interesting. If you've never seen how a spring is made, you're in for a treat.

Happy DNA Day, Eukaryotes!

It was 55 years ago that Watson and Crick first discovered the double helix structure of DNA. And it was five years ago that the Human Genome Project completed the rough sequencing of the Homo Sapiens version of that structure. These discoveries will change our world more than just about anything else I can think of.

So raise a glass, tankard, mug, or flagon to the daring geniuses who helped us find our place in this vast ocean of time and space.

Growlers

growler n. One, such as a dog, that growls. A small iceberg. Informal. A container, such as a pail or pitcher, that is used for carrying beer.

Dennis brought some summer beer over this week and we got the season kicked off in grand style. The stories and adventures are always bigger and better in the summer. Summer is my favorite season. As anyone who reads this blog knows, I love to eat outdoors, and we have a rule that unless there is hail, rain, pestilence, or perhaps a tornado, the family will be out there, sipping and eating and talking about larger-than-life summer things.

Parking

We rode our bikes to the park the other day, and the kids had a veritable blast. Zach let Maddie ride on his lap down the big-kid slides and she took to it like a fish to that wet stuff made of two hydrogens and one oxygen. She didn't want to leave. I think they both became closer friends because of it, and I'll take that!

Maddie has often since been heard saying "Park...Slide...Zachy..."

The Day Of Terra Firma

Happy Earth Day, Earthlings! It really is a cool planet, with blue nitrogen skies, liquid water oceans, and literally brimming with life. Who could ask for more? It's not just a nice place to visit, either...I've been living here most of my life and I can't imagine living anywhere else.

Doggies!

Maddie's current favorite movie is "Doggies!", known to most adults as 101 Dalmatians. If Maddie walks into the room and the Television is on and 101 Dalmatians is not playing, she takes that as a personal affront. Such a situation must be rectified at the first possible opportunity.

She is mesmerized by this movie, so it's worth losing your favorite show to it. The best part is when the horn on the big scary car honks, and she screams "Coo-ella!!!"

Jitters

Today is an all-out, go-for-broke, caffeine bachanalia buzz fest. Heather and I both woke up So tired from the weekend festivities that we had to be dragged out of bed by a special last-minute act of congress.

I'm drinking coffee like a jet pilot on night patrol. I feel a low-level humming, not unlike the background echo of the Big Bang, permeating my every nerve ending. I'm hot, radioactive, ultra-alert . Jumpy as a Joey. The faintest sound sends chills up my spine and into my brain like shockwaves from a grenade.

Really, really dreading coming down from this. It could be bad. No spotters, no net. Just a hard desk top to break my fall.

Simular

Simular \Sim"u*lar\, n. [Cf. L. simulator, F. simulateur. See Simulate.]
One who pretends to be what he is not; one who, or that
which, simulates or counterfeits something; a pretender.

I'm at the vet the other day, bringing Coco in for her semi-annual array of very expensive and probably completely needless vaccines and tests. I'm tired, and a little crabby, and I want to get home. After the appointment I walked up to the counter. Coco was her usual bundle of unmanageable energy, trying to "see" the kittens in the cage in the corner.

Three girls at the counter, all in their 20's. They cannot process my obscene bill until they agree on the correct spelling of the word "simular". One thinks there is an "e" on the end, and another thinks it has an "e" instead of a "u" in the "middle. They ask me for help to solve the conundrum, because none of them can find it in the dictionary. Finally she finds it and all it says is "something about pretending". She looks puzzled..."you know, like, this condition is simular to that one?".

I rest my head in my hands as Coco goes nuts all over a lab puppy that just walked in. By now you can also see that the word they were looking for was "similar". When I told them this, they looked at me like I was some kind of genius. No hint of embarrassment that three educated girls couldn't spell a word that they use every other day. None, whatsoever. Just awe.

I wish the rest of life was that easy.

Three Days Before Monday

When it's Friday, I like to say the word "Friday" alot, and talk about Friday things like the upcoming weekend and outdoor stuff and where to get the best deals on cats. It makes Friday seem more real, and makes me appreciate it more. And on Sunday night I don't have to wonder: "What the hell happened to Friday?".

We Have A Winner...

I have just been handed a news release that confirms that Brandy has guessed Heather's "condition". Congratulations Brandy, you're the first one. All my other readers are wallowing in a deep fog and have been half-wondering why I keep posting pictures of blueberries and kidney beans and quarters.

Brino The Rhino

Thanks in part to your outpouring of well-wishes, positive thoughts, and trout sacrifices to the river goddess, Brian has come out of his surgery well, without the searing pain that was predicted. Who "nose", he may be up and about in a day or two...

Nosey

Brian is having surgery today, so everyone wish him luck. He always blamed me for breaking his nose with an errant fastball when we were younger, but I have always maintained that he was born with a deviated septum. Perhaps the surgeon can settle the bet, because he's finally getting the internals fixed up so he can breathe better.

W2's As They Relate To Rectal Health

We had to amend our taxes this year due to a rogue W2 that crossed the finish line late. Between that and my use of the schedule C form for the photography business, I have been assured by TurboTax that I am at the flaming red, high end of the scale for audit risk. Somewhere between Martha Stewart and Al Capone. I can't say that pleases me. I am going to stop at the drug store on the way home today for a big jar of petroleum jelly, just in case I am missing a few receipts.

Two Maladies And A Condition

Heather has been very much "under the weather" lately, and is just now starting to recover. She's got a couple of maladies (and one "condition") to contend with, so the going has been slow. With any luck, she'll be feeling like eating outside on the patio once the weather warms up, and we can get on with life again.

Here's a cyber get well wish, HB!

There Comes A Time

There is a moment, as inevitable as it is grave, that every father dreads. It signals the beginning of the end as surely as the first gray hair or hand tremble. This moment is a life-changing event. It's the time the father realizes that his son can beat him at something.

We fathers cherish our superiority over the young. We love knowing that through size or wisdom or cleverness we can best our children in just about anything. And then one day, usually without warning,everything changes. The rug is pulled out from under us and in a moment we are no longer number one. We retreat to our caves, tail between our legs and licking wounds, and look behind us to see our child dancing in victory.

Well, my time came this past weekend. I was playing Super Mario Galaxy with Zach. He often lets (makes) me play during the hard parts because I am (was) better at these kinds of things than he. Well, there was one particularly challenging level that really had me frustrated. Zach was badgering me with phrases like "C'mon Dad, didn't you SEE that? You have to go THAT way!". This eventually got to me and I handed him the controller and said "Zach, it's VERY hard, if you think you can do better, YOU try".

Well, by now you can probably see to the end of this story. He completed the challenge, first try, and invented a new technique while he was doing so that completely rendered the most challenging gimmick of the level inert.

The look on his face was a mixture of glory and pity. And, I think, there was a realization that this was just the beginning of his long climb to superiority. And though this life event was a bit distressing to me, I am also proud of my little guy. He's learning and challenging and thinking and innovating more and more all the time, and this makes me happy, because I know he'll be successful in this very difficult world.

DHLPPC

I've been really remiss in getting Coco to the vet for her vaccines. So I finally made an appointment. If she's especially well-behaved this week, We'll just do the vaccinations. On the other hand, if she chews any curtains or furniture we might just make a hat out of her.

Ok, just kidding. We love every furry inch of the little beast.

Denizen

This is what Maddie calls Dennis. It means a frequenter or dweller of a certain place, as in "Denizens of the Swamp". Our Denizen doesn't dwell in a swamp though, he drives a Volkswagen. This morning as she left the house, Maddie was chatting on about Denizen's Car. She likes Denizen.

The Shifting Diets Of Omnivores

Zach has gone through many iterations of the palette of foods that he likes. In the beginning he would eat anything you put in front of him, a little like Maddie does now, except he liked fish too.

Then he went through a phase where he wouldn't eat anything, willingly. Dinner often involved pleads, threats, and outright trickery. Eventually you could get enough down his gullet so that he could survive.

Now he's starting to like food again, probably because he's growing so fast. I keep a list of the foods he likes so I can have something to go by, and hopefully to avoid the dreaded "Pasta?! I HATE that!" proclamation.

So here is the current list. All specs subject to change at a moments notice.

California Rolls - This is the absolute favorite, buy a mile. He'll eat as many of these as I can make.

Gumbo & Dirty Rice - Haven't made this in a few months, so we'll have to do a status check.

Channa Masala - One of HB's faves too, I make it spicy and very sour.

Pizza - What kid doesn't? But he only truly digs on commercial...eck! He doesn't like my homemade ones so much.

Shish Kabob with Yogurt Sauce & Couscous - I make this one frequently in the summer, so Kabob season is just starting.

Stir Fry with Rice - He likes the big cast iron wok too!

Mexican with Salsa - He especially likes meat, so shredded chicken is a favorite.

King Crab Legs - Expensive habit, like crack without the stigma. At least I know my family doesn't have shellfish allergies.

Thai Beef with Broccoli - A smoking hot, sour version with lots of garlic.

He also likes a few "supermarket" pre-packaged things, but I try not to do that too much. He really likes Trader Joe's Thai noodle cups and spicy Thai tuna packets.

It's also interesting to note the things he does NOT like that many kids do: French fries for example, or anything deep fried for that matter. I consider that a good thing. And he only likes really good (read: expensive) cheese. He's more of a Parmigiano Reggiano & Manchego kid and not so much Velveeta & American :)

Oh, there is one more food that he loves in all seasons and all times, of course, the one food that never goes out of style...candy.

Getting Bigger

Overheard At Work #462

"Yeah, my wife had a really bad cold and she went to see that same herbal doctor that I see for my hand. She came home with over a hundred dollars in herbs. But you know, those herbs cleared her cold right up, in a week or so."

Ala King

Last night we got the reminder call that Ala is coming today to clean the house. She is Polish and doesn't speak much English, and her husband Tony doesn't speak much more.

(my phone buzzes)

"Hello?"

"Alooo!? Alooo? Dis Dabeed? Dabeed, dis Tony. I remind...Ala is comink tomooroo?"

"Yes", I say, "tomooroo is fine, I mean, er...tomorrow is fine". And thusly it is done. Our lives will once again be transformed by Ala's cleansing powers.

Hot Summer Nights

I was young and it was summer. I had lots of friends and one of them asked me over for a sleepover. He had a cute sister who I kinda had a crush on, so I accepted. But, it was summer, as I said. And it was a really hot night. At my house, we had a window air conditioner that my dad would turn on only when it was really hot (oh how I loved the sound of that old thing cranking up). On those nights we would sleep on the living room floor, right under that thing. This was such a night, hot and humid and still.

When I got to my friends house we played and goofed off like always. But when it was time to go to sleep I noticed that they had no air conditioning. It was a miserable half night. I say "half" night because I woke up at about 2am sweltering, snuck out, and left. I rode my bike home, went inside and spent the second half under that glorious cold box.

Of course, my friend's parents were terrified when they all discovered I was missing the next morning. At the time I couldn't figure out what the big deal was.

A Little Bribe Never Hurts

Check this out...our mailman leaves the dogs each a treat every day on the mailbox. He even knows we have two dogs, presumably because he sees them through the window, undulating and jumping around in a gonzo barking frenzy when he arrives.

The dogs, being the semi-intelligent creatures that they are, have figured out the mailman-treat connection. I assume this is what the mailman wants. Very sneaky guy, this mailman. He knows the canine brain. They like him now, I think.

If we even go near the mailbox, there the pooches are, at full attention and salivating, waiting for their mailman treats.

California Rolling

I made Zach's favorite dinner last night: California Rolls. He digs these in much the same way a vampire likes blood. Fairly picky about what he eats lately, he nonetheless doesn't merely eat California Rolls, he inhales them. He ate everything I made, and he greedily hungered for more. I can still picture him licking the last sticky rice particles off his plate with a ravenous look in his eyes. Then he looked up from his plate and gave me a look like anything could happen.

I slowly withdrew my hands from the table and crouched down low in my chair to avoid being consumed in the feeding frenzy.

Nice Girls & Flappers

It happened in a darkened, cave-like basement bar in Tempe, Arizona, popular with the college kids, sometime in 1991. I think it was called "The Rat Cellar", or something. My mother and brother Brian were both visiting from Michigan, and we were out getting a bite to eat.

At the table next to us, five or six cute ASU girls were drinking beers, from the bottle. Nothing unusual for a child of the 70's like myself. But for my mother, raised during the depression and dust bowl years, that was atrocious. Like smoking, swearing, and listening to Jazz, "nice" girls just didn't do that back then. Flappers did.

Not able to take her eyes off the offenders, she said "Look at that...Brian, have you ever seen girls drink beer from a bottle before?"

Without pausing, my brother said "Mom, I've seen girls drink beer through a funnel!".

The look on my mother's face can not easily be described. It was somewhere between surprise and bewilderment, with a touch of disgust.

EDITOR'S NOTE: Brian has accused me of revisionist history, and says this really happened in an Indian Restaurant in Michigan. Perhaps, but the story is still funny as hell. So there... :)

Apple To The Core

I have always liked Apple, Inc. This is a well-run company that is finally getting the recognition it deserves for all the great products it has been making for years. But it wasn't until I had a perplexing and complicated issue with my calendar syncing that I really learned how good this company is. They say some companies have figured out how to benefit from customer issues, by handling them so well that the customer comes out with an overall positive experience and a better view of the company. This was such an experience for me.

We have two Macs and keep everything in sync between them using "Dot Mac". Everything except the calendar events that is, which for some reason would not sync no matter what I tried. I am used to handling all computer problems myself, because computer companies are notoriously evil and wicked, so I wrote to Apple Support with some feelings of trepidation and anxiety.

Just about as soon as I sent my email I got an automatic reply from Apple that my issue was being sent to a customer support analyst who would get back to me shortly. Which he did by email, in about an hour. He was polite and asked me some questions and had me try a few standard things. When it became clear that this was a more challenging issue, he sent my case to a second-level tech. This guy was amazing. He sent me a special program that records all relevant system variables so they can be studied in detail. He wrote to me day and night, often within hours of my responses. He went through lots of technical procedures and worked with me until he had an idea that this issue warranted the ultimate treatment: referral to an Apple iCal software engineer. This is a guy who knows iCal inside and out because he helped design it, and he was taking on my case personally.

A few more exchanges back and forth (including one written late at night by the support tech that said he was "going over my posts again while engineering looked at this issue and had a few more questions") and my problem was solved. And the conditions that led to it, unusual as they were, are being studied by the software engineers for a future permanent fix to the application.

I have never had an experience like that with any company, ever. It still amazes me that these guys actually seemed to care about my issue. And they cared for free, too. Try that with Dell.

Winky

Winky (seen here, left), one of the two former Detroit Zoo elephants moved to a wildlife sanctuary in California, has died. The elephants, like more and more throughout the country, had been moved to the refuge as a way to give them more space to roam and play. Zoos just don't have room enough for elephants.

Winky was 57 years old and just didn't have the energy to continue so she had to be "put down". I feel pretty sad about this, because I grew up going to the zoo and have probably seen Winky a hundred times or more in my life. And she was never once mean to me, and that really says something. Those dung-flinging Macaque monkeys, on the other hand...but I digress.

So, goodbye Winky. Wanda (at right), your bestest elephant friend, is going to really miss you, and of course I will to.

Hair

Zach Attack

Almost nine years of hard rockin', and showing no signs of slowin' down.

iPhones

In December we're planning on ditching Sprint (shhhh...don't tell them or they'll be all over us) and joining Gregory House in iPhone coolness. We already use Macs, so all of our mail, addresses, phone numbers, music, pictures, and calendars are ready to sync!

Geometric Multiplication

Getting bigger, every day!

Happy New Beer's Day!

Seventy-five years ago today, beer (limited to 3.2%), became legal. Wine, spirits, and "real" beer were some months away, but it was the beginning of the end of prohibition.

Of course, remnants of the temperance movement are still with us, in the 3.2 beer states out west, Sunday alcohol restrictions, state-owned liquor stores, and dry counties sprinkled throughout the south. But the amendment that gave us the "Speak Easy" and made criminals out of millions of Americans while making real criminals very rich was repealed effective 75 years ago today.

Salud!

Mary Was Yurt, But Not Hurt

My poor sister was driving up north, coming home from a fun time in a Yurt, when her car rolled over on it's side. She came out without a scratch or ache, but her poor Escape didn't escape so unscathed. As you can see (note: everything goes back to The Big Lebowski) "Dude's car got a little banged up..."

And she's also had a bad illness for the past 6 weeks, so everyone wish good things for Mary..she needs some good luck and no more bent sheet metal or infected sinuses.

Cocoschmocoleptopopolo

If you know me, and I know you, then you have at least one nickname. It's just my thing, like Einstein had the crazy hair and Mr. T sports gold chains. I love nicknames. Zach has had at least thirty in his short life. And I gave him the "nickname gene" too, because he is the one who came up with "Heatherbaby".

The shortest nickname I have ever bestowed is "i", which is tied with in number of letters but skinnier than "Z". Probably the longest would be one of Coco's many nombres: "Cocoschmocoleptopopolo".

If I do know you and you can't remember what any of your various nicknames are, just let me know and I'll fill you in. That is, if I can say them to your face :)

Spring Fever

One of my co-workers has very serious allergies that make him sneeze, on average, about 600 times an hour. In fact, they may be so serious as to be terminal, if I lose my mind and kill him.

As for formalities, I told him I would say "Gesundheit!" once more and that will cover my responsibilities for the rest of the season.

Hammering And Climbing

It was another crazy Wild Weekend, complete with electrical wiring, ladder climbing, zoo going, outside eating, Wii playing, Dairy Queen eating fun. It was a handyman weekend extraordinaire, I installed a new porch light and fixed the gutters (and they DID need fixing) and even went to Lowes TWICE. I got to flex my manly muscles and make grunting noises as I hammered and did all kinds of other manly things.

Next project: new front steps!

Aww, That's Keen, Mrs. Cleaver

Today was "Keen Day" in the Wild family. We all got our new Keens for the coming summer of fun and hiking and running around and walking and relaxing and working and then hiking some more. This is a new family tradition. We all love Keens because they are adventurous yet comfortable, cool yet not ostentatious.

And we like the name too: Keen. Sounds like a 50's word.

Stripes

Zach's current favorite animal. I think he digs the cool paint jobs and all that speed. Zebras are striped so that they blend in to one another on the African plains, making individuals much harder for lions to pick out. In fact, I'll bet you didn't even realize that there are TWO zebras in this picture. See what I mean? Masters of deceit. Amazing.