Size Matters

"The San Francisco Chronicle recently got confirmation from TSA officials that there are more items specifically allowed in carry-on luggage than you might expect. Among them are whips, chains, handcuffs, vibrators, and other personal "toys" that don't exceed certain measurements—in other words, they're OK to go as long they don't become 'club-like.'"

 

So, ok. This tells me that somebody at the TSA was responsible for determining the maximum acceptable size of dildo before it becomes a weapon. That's not just a number you can pull out of ... um... the air. Someone, or perhaps a team of people, had to get some dildos in various sizes and whack people with them until they determined the maximum non-weaponized size. I know the two-headed ones you see at bachelor parties are way over the limit. One of those could definitely be used to stun a pilot pretty effectively. But somewhere between that extreme and the small purse-sized models that most of my female readers and probably a few of my male readers carry to work, there is a threshold of violence.

 

Now I want to know what the number is. They have to tell us if we ask, right? You first.