Carbon

[JULES]
Pigs are filthy animals. I don't eat filthy animals.

[VINCENT]
But bacon tastes good, pork chops taste good...

[JULES]
Hey, sewer rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I'd never know 'cause I wouldn't eat the filthy motherf***ers.

Although I don't share that particular hit-man's aversion to eating filthy animals, I am nonetheless not a big bacon eater. It's a little salty for me.

But my lovely bride loves it and every now and then she gets a craving for it and I am more than happy to make some.

Ahhh...sometimes life doesn't come out as we plan. As you can see, I burned it silly. I burned it rotten. Super-crispy-plus, it turned into a black steaming pile of smelly carbon. Extra, extra, extra well-done.

I post this as a kind of public humiliation to both document and commemorate my shame. I have since paid my private penance by buying more bacon and frying it perfectly golden crispy the way my lover likes it.

So, now I am cleansed.